Random Musings...

Last night was kindergarten graduation. It seems it was just yesterday I was blogging about how emotional I was for my baby to start school and now I can't believe he is done with his first year. They had an adorable program where they all stood up and sang the songs they have been learning all year. At the end, they each walked across the stage to receive a "Certificate of Graduation" as Mrs. Fauth announced what they want to be when they grow up. Jacob apparently wants to be a teacher (news to us - it usually changes on a daily basis. Mostly he says he wants to be a dad).

After graduation, we treated the student to dinner at McDonald's, and then we went for a walk at "The Running Place", more commonly known as the Chemeketa Community College track. Brian and I walked for several laps while the kiddies ran, walked, laid in the grass, rolled down the hill and tackled each other in the middle of the soccer field. All the while our Blossom slept like a good girl in the front pack. It was a wonderful evening full of picture worthy moments.

If I had my camera.


Which I never do.


Not at graduation.


Not at the hospital when Leah was born (okay, that one doesn't count, I was at work in labor for an hour and a half before I actually went to the hospital...)


Not at birthday parties.


Not at Family Game Night.


Pretty much never.

I have the best of intentions, really. I usually have it on the list to take places like camping or visits to Grandma's, but I rarely remember to take it out once we get there. More often I just plain forget to pack it. I think it is due to all the years I lived with or near Jennifer, who is a fabulous photographer and always captured everything I would have wanted to and better than I ever would have. My mother has also become a wonderful picture taker, and scrapbooks the pics so beautifully, so you can understand why my motivation is lagging.

So I got to beating myself up over not having captured pictures of one of my first born's rites of passage. Anyone who knows me well knows that I hate having to work and be away from my kids, and I constantly worry about how I am failing them. Today, however, I took the advice my mother so often gives me and when I started beating myself up over my shortcomings, I also made a list of my successes as a mother.

My Downfalls

• My kids love soda TOO MUCH, mostly because I let them have it too young and too often (Jacob called it sauce for years)


• My boys always need haircuts sooner than I ever get around to getting them


• Jacob may very well be made out of equal parts white bread and peanut butter. He loves it, always has and I serve it too often for dinner when I am too pooped to do better.


• Both of my boys love movies like Transformers and Spider Man. Probably (definitely) too old for them but they love them so I let them watch them.


• If Jake is made of peanut butter, Austin is chocolate milk. He could live on that alone if you let him, and I have more than once.
• I put sunscreen on my kids - usually - , but somehow they are still ridiculously tan all the time!


• I'm not good at getting down on the floor and playing -- TIME!

My Strengths

• I love my kids fiercely, almost to distraction. Sometimes I think it's unhealthy - (no not THAT kind of unhealthy, I just spend too much time dithering...)


• My kids love books and reading, because I have read to them since they could listen. It has always been a part of quiet time and bed time routines. Brian and I both love to read and have had a lifelong love of books and want the same for our kids.


• I foster their imagination. The boys and I spent many nights in the recliner ( when I was soooo pregnant tired) looking at the texture in the ceiling and imagining what we could see up there. Works great with a cloudy sky as well.


• I am so ok with them getting filthy! We are so grateful to have a big yard where they can run and play and in my book, the dirtier they are, the more fun they are having.


• I try to have one on one dates with the boys, and will do it with Leah when she is old enough. They need time where my attention is theirs and theirs alone, even if it's just on a trip to WinCo.


• I take my kids to church. I didn't for a long time and I regret that. It has been the most amazing thing to watch their little testimonies of Jesus Christ grow as they learn about Him. Going to the temple next weekend to be sealed as a family is really a culmination of my desire to get Jacob to primary, and our family has been so blessed by it!